It's Not Too Late!

It’s Not Too Late to join the Swim Team!
The Answerman

Jason: Help. I need your help. I was supposed to sign my boy Melvin up for the swim team in April. My wife gave me a MapQuest to the community center and $120 cash in order to register him. I don’t know how it happened but somehow my neighbor Ted and I ended up at Ruby Tuesday’s eating chili & wings and consuming adult beverages. The first time I looked at my watch it was 10:45 pm, my cash and wings were finished, the community center was dark and my goose is cooked. Can you help me and does my wife have to know?

Answerman: Be at peace Jason. If this was any other sport, you would be toast. We at the swim team are a mellow and understanding group and have made allowances for people in your circumstance. In fact, I believe this same thing happened to you the last two seasons. You will have to cough up a $20 late fee to pay for your sin and our inconvenience. Go to our web site www.chdolphins.net and print off a registration form.
Mail it along with your money and a note begging forgiveness to Martha Macdonald 13346 Scottsmore Way , Herndon, VA 20171. Your wife need never know of your transgression.

Nicole: I was wondering if my husband Jason ever signed our son Melvin up for the swim team?

Answerman: Yes, Nicole. Jason successfully completed his mission.

Margaret: You have written that swimming will make my daughter Maggie feel good. Could you be more specific and use some of that pseudo sports medicine terminology. I just love when you do that.

Answerman: Certainly Margaret. After a hard working set Maggie will be producing excess lactic acid which will gradually dissipate during her warm down set. Mild discomfort will be replaced with a feeling of relaxed looseness. A solid practice will raise Maggie’s level of serotonin and increase the release of endorphins, leading to a state of mild euphoria.

Margaret: I think I will take up swimming!

Answerman: It’s a beautiful thing.